Bertha Oates' Valentine
by Anya5
Summary: Professor Severus Snape cures Bertha from her "love" sickness.


"Bertha Oates' Valentine"  
  
by Anya  
  
  
  
**He's so handsome. His long nose is so... delicious... and perfect. And his eyes are so black, so beautiful, especially when he's looking at me...** Bertha put down her quill and looked dreamily at the professor. Snape was swishing around the class checking on students. "Oh, if he'd only look at me once more..." she dreamed.  
  
-Didn't I say two inches each, Longbottom?! -Snape was foaming with anger -Is that two inches? Class, -Snape turned to his students holding a quarter inch long root in his hand -is that two inches? Can't you follow simple directions, Longbottom?! I have written them on the blackboard! You shall not have another root, boy. You'll use these for your potion. -Snape pointed his finger at the short, uneven pieces on Neville's desk -And ten points from Griffindor for not paying proper attention in class.  
  
"He's so smart..." Bertha had her eyes fixed right on Snape. "Will he ever pay any attention to me? If he'd only knew how I feel."  
  
-What are you gaping at, Ms. Oates? -spat Snape in her direction. -Don't you have a job to do?!  
  
"Oh, he's looking at me again!!!" Bertha was all excited. "That gaze... hmmm, I wish I could look in his eyes forever..."  
  
-Ms. Oates! -growled Snape -It's either you stop daydreaming or ten points from Ravenclaw!  
  
-I'm sorry professor. -she said shyly, -Severus. -she added in a whisper.  
  
Bertha was sitting in Ravenclaw common room. White snow was dancing with the wind outside of the windows. The flames of the fireplace gave a nice warmth. "How romantic" thought Bertha. "All I need now is Professor Snape sitting next to me... holding my hand... looking straight at me... " She opened her diary and dipped the tip of her quill in the black ink. **February 10th: Today we had Potions with Griffindor again. Professor wore his sexy, black cloak, as usual. He took Harry to his desk and talked to him. I don't know what about, but I wish it was me... I wonder, does he realize that there is a girl who truly loves him? That she sits right in front of him, in his class? I hope he doesn't have a girlfriend! Today I noticed some yellow dirt in his left ear. His ears are really sexy, so big and curly... inside I mean.**  
  
-Hey Bertha, what are you doing? -she heard her friend Catsy.  
  
-Eehhh... -quickly she closed her diary. -Nothing much. How about you?  
  
-Do you know it's only four days left?! -Catsy said with excitement -Three actually.  
  
-Three days to what?  
  
-Valentine's Day of course, you dummy!!! -Catsy laughed.  
  
-Oh, that...  
  
-Yeah, so, who are you giving your valentine to?  
  
-What? Eh, nobody.  
  
-Don't tell me you don't like anybody! Every girl is giving valentine to someone! See, I'm giving one to Draco. He's so dashing! And Emeralda has one for Neville, you know, Neville Longbottom. She's nuts about him, but too shy to ask him out.  
  
-And she's giving him a valentine?  
  
-Yeah. Hopefully he'll notice her. So tell me, who do you like, huh? You must like someone!  
  
-Well, you're right, there is someone...  
  
-Do I know him?  
  
-Sort of... yeah, you do.  
  
-What house he's in? Come on, tell me!!  
  
-I can't tell you that.  
  
-What's his name? -Catsy wouldn't give up.  
  
-I'll tell you on the fourteenth. I promise. I gotta go now.  
  
Bertha ran out of the common room. "That's it!" she thought. "That's it! That's what I'm going to do! This is the only thing that will make him notice me! The fourteenth... let's see now. I'll have one Potion class on the twelfth and one on the... FOURTEENTH!!! Oh, I'll need to plan this out."  
  
Bertha didn't care whether she had potions with Griffindor or Slytherin. All she cared about was Professor Snape. Today he was sitting behind his desk covered with papers. **... and I love his hair. All the kids say that he never washes his hair, but I don't believe that. It does look sort of... unwashed... but maybe he simply doesn't have the time.** she wrote instead of powdering her ingredients. **Maybe, as soon as I let him know about my feeling toward him, he'll let me wash his hair. I wouldn't mind doing it every night. Gently massaging his head, playing with his ears, touching his neck... Oh, chills...**  
  
-May I ask, what are you doing, Ms. Oates? -said Snape. -Did you finish powdering your leeches?  
  
Bertha quickly shoved her diary into her bookbag.  
  
-Yes, Professor... -she started -I mean, no... I mean... sorry...  
  
Snape stood up and slowly walked toward her desk.  
  
"He's standing right next to me!" Bertha was shivering "I'm such an idiot! He'll think I'm stupid, I'll die!!!"  
  
-Ms. Oates, you haven't even gone through half of your work -said Snape in a silky voice -What have we been doing, huh?  
  
Professor bent down, rested his right arm on Bertha's desk and leaned forward, so that his face was very close to hers. Looking straight in her eyes he said,  
  
-In our next class, we are going to make the Truth Potion, Ms. Oates. Would you like to volunteer yourself as the first one to try it?  
  
Bertha wouldn't even blink.  
  
-You all are just a herd of twits, plotting, scheming, and amusing yourselves with your childish ideas on the account of your teachers! -Snape turned around and started pacing around the class. -There is not a single thought in your empty heads of the people, who sacrifice their own time and strengths trying to teach you something!  
  
Bertha's head was exploding. "He was so close, so close to my face! He was looking right into my eyes! I can't believe it! He wouldn't have done it, if he didn't have any feelings towards me! Professor Snape finally noticed me! And his eyes... oh, so beautiful... Totally black with those little strings around his pupils... just like thunderbolts!" Bertha felt as if a real thunderbolt went right through her insides.  
  
-Ten points from Ravenclaw, Ms. Oates -howled Snape impatiently -for senseless staring at your teacher! Do you have problems with your sight? What is it, Ms. Oates or shall I make it twenty?!  
  
-Sorry... - it was all she was able to say.  
  
For the next two days, Bertha was working hard on her valentine card. She wasn't even sure if she should make a card, write a letter, a poem or something else. She wanted it to be perfect. She wanted to let Professor Snape know, that her feeling for him were not just a puppy love. It was something real, alive, burning inside of her and screaming to let it out. Every time she picked up her quill, she saw the tall, manly, black figure of Professor Severus Snape leaning toward her, her face, closer, and closer... She desperately wanted to hold his hand, feel his hair - even wash it -and adore the curlings inside of his ears.  
  
-So, you said you'll let me know today! -Catsy ran up to Bertha in the very morning.  
  
-Oh, yes, but after the classes.  
  
-Don't make me wait so long! -Catsy was jumping in excitement -When are you going to give him your valentine?  
  
-Right after classes.  
  
-That's after Potions. I hope that stupid Snape won't make us work hard today... Hehe, I can't even imagine anyone loving such brute as Snape! Can I see your valentine?  
  
-No! -Bertha's anger was growing -And just go! I told you I'll tell you later. Just leave me alone!  
  
-Fine. But you promised to tell me!  
  
-Fine!!! Go!!!  
  
"How dare she call Professor Snape a BRUTE!!! She doesn't know him! She called him stupid! She is stupid herself! Really! I don't understand why people don't see his charm, his beauty? But maybe it's better. Better for me, 'cause he'll be all mine". Bertha smiled at the thought. She carefully put her valentine inside her diary and proceeded to her class.  
  
  
  
-Instead of working on the Truth Potion -announced Snape -we'll be starting the Optical Potion. One of the main purposes of this potions is to make the one who drinks it, see things, that others want him to see.  
  
"I wish I could make Professor Snape drink one. I would make him see us, together, holding hands and softly kissing in the darkest corner of Hogwarts castle..."  
  
-As usual, I'll write the ingredients on the board. -said Snape and turned around to the blackboard.  
  
Bertha turned the page in her diary and continued with her input. **Tall doesn't always mean handsome, but in this case it's true. He's beautiful (can't say that enough). I just had the greatest thought: him and me, holding each other's hands, sitting in the dark room and kissing. Oh, I'd die to taste his lips, just once!** Bertha sighed and picked up her head to once more look at Snape. Instead, however, she saw a row of black buttons right in front of her.  
  
-Tut, tut, tut, Ms. Oates -said Snape slowly -caught at the scene of crime. Hand me that book!  
  
"no... no... what am I going to do..." Bertha didn't move.  
  
-Hand that book over! -barked Snape -I would like to know what is so important to you right now. More important than education -he added with a small smirk.  
  
With shaking hands she picked up her diary and handed it to Snape. She knew she was finished now. Snape will surely read her diary out loud, embarrasing her in front of the whole class and the whole school! And moreover, between the pages of her diary, there was THE valentine. The valentine for Snape himself. She was intending to leave it on his desk after class, saying she found it, unnoticed or... it didn't matter now! He is going to humiliate her and make fun of her love for him. She all trembled at the thought.  
  
The whole class went silent. Snape carried the diary to his desk and sat down. He seemed to enjoy the whole situation. He grinned and his eyes glittered.  
  
-Maybe Ms. Oates would like to come up and read it to us herself? -said Snape -No? Well, we'll find out for ourselves, then.  
  
He opened the diary on the last page and chuckled loudly.  
  
-It's a diary, am I right, Ms. Oates? -Snape smiled nastily -Oh, having problems with your love life? Let's see, he is tall, and handsome... "Oh, I'd die to taste his lips, just once".  
  
Snape, who seemed to be quite amused, looked at Bertha. She felt her face going all red.  
  
-Tell us, who is it -said Snape -is it Weasley maybe? Or Mr. Longbottom, huh? Let's see... none of them are tall and handsome... Is it Potter's lips you would die to taste, Ms. Oates?  
  
By now the whole class was giggling. Bertha couldn't bear such humiliation. She buried her red face in her hands and felt tears coming to her eyes. How could he!  
  
Snape laughed loudly. Then, from between the pages, a single page flew out of the book.  
  
-And what that might be?  
  
Snape bent down and picked it up. His grin widened as he unfolded the page. He stood up, stepped to the center of the pedestal and read starting somewhere in the middle:  
  
Now as I look upon you  
  
Every single day  
  
I realize, that without you  
  
My life is sad and gray  
  
The first time I saw you  
  
First time I saw your face  
  
I thought you were an angel  
  
Compounded of love and grace  
  
Everyone in the class could hear Bertha sobbing loudly. Snape, however, continued:  
  
The glitter of your eyes  
  
The beauty of your shape  
  
There's much more to love you for  
  
My dear Prof...  
  
Snape paused abruptly. He looked as if he chocked on something. The class was silent again. Every pair of eyes, except for Bertha's, were turned to Snape. Then, a loud thud was heard from Bertha's desk. She jumped up from her seat, grabbed her bookbag, and ran to the door. Snape was faster. He ran after her and shut the door right in front of her nose.  
  
-No. -he said.  
  
Snape grabbed a handful of Bertha's robes and pulled her to the side. Holding her firmly he yelled,  
  
-OUT!!! EVERYONE OUT!!! You're all dismissed!!! Get out!  
  
Within seconds petrified students left Snape's class. He closed the door behind them and let go of Bertha's cloak.  
  
-Go and sit. -he said to her  
  
Obediently she went back to her desk. She hid her face in her arms and sobbed. It was a very long time until she calmed herself down. When she looked up again, she saw Snape sitting behind the desk next to her. He was silent and his face showed a deep concentration. He didn't look at her, though. The quietness of the place felt quite uncomfortable to Bertha, so she whispered,  
  
-I'm sorry, Professor...  
  
Snape looked at her.  
  
-No, don't be -he said.  
  
Then, they sat silent for awhile. Finally, Snape stood up and went back to his desk.  
  
-That was a valentine poem, wasn't it -he said sharply -Answer me.  
  
-Yes -Bertha whispered.  
  
-Who did you write it for?  
  
Bertha could feel tears coming to her eyes again.  
  
-Who did you write it for?! -said Snape almost with anger. -For Merlin's sake, say it!  
  
-For... for you... Professor... -said Bertha with eyes full of tears.  
  
-And who did you write about in your diary?  
  
-You... you, Professor...  
  
Snape laughed with a deep voice.  
  
-"...dark room, die to taste his lips" -he quoted and laughed again.  
  
-Come then -he said in an orderly manner -come then, and get your valentine, Ms. Oates.  
  
Bertha looked at Snape not sure what is he talking about.  
  
-Are you coming or not? -said Snape impatiently -I said come and get it. -he waved his hand suggestively at her diary on his desk.  
  
Bertha stood up and walked slowly towards Snape desk. When she was about to stretch her arm to pick up the book, suddenly Snape grabbed her arms and pulled her to himself.  
  
-If you tell it to anyone, anyone at all, -he whispered looking straight in her Bertha's eyes -you WILL die.  
  
Snape muttered something and the classroom's lights dimmed.  
  
-Happy Valentine, Ms. Oates -said Snape and closed her half opened lips with his. Bertha felt her stomach falling. Snape's warm breath on her cheek made her head spinning. His tongue penetrated her mouth deeply, faster and slower, harshly, almost painfully, and gently, nearly tickling. The new, unknown feeling overtook her body making her unable to breath. Snape let go of her, leaving his spit on her mouth. Bertha looked at Snape. That kiss... it was... unthinkable, something electrifying... it was... DISGUSTING!!!  
  
She stepped back, grabbed her diary and with a scream she ran out of the class, leaving Snape laughing behind her.  
  
And hour later Snape met Dumbledore on the corridor.  
  
-Ah, Severus -said Dumbledore -I don't know if you heard, but we have a very extreme case of shock at the Hospital Wing. It's Bertha Oates. Have you heard anything about it?  
  
-No, Headmaster -said Snape with a grin. 


End file.
